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Author Archives: maze

Florida Woman Bets Cop She Can Guess Her BAC

From what I’ve heard about The Villages, this story seems about right. 62-year-old Mary Westerlund was pulled over on Monday night after reports of “a drunk female present at the fire station.” A sheriff’s deputy noted that she had bloodshot eyes and slurred speech. And when she began to scream at him that she was not going to jail, he ... Read More »

New Zealand Man Threatens To Kill Friend Over Flat-Earth Bet

This is basically proof that you should never argue with stupid. 36-year-old Jamie Sutherland and Louie Lanz have been friends since elementary school, but that still didn’t stop one from threatening to kill the other. It all started during a dinner the two had, where Lanz kept trying to convince Sutherland that the Earth was flat. Obviously, Sutherland wasn’t buying ... Read More »

New Jersey Woman Torches Man’s House After Booty Call Gone Wrong

If you’re going to make the call, maybe stay awake…is a lesson that one guy learned the hard way. 29-year-old Taija Russell received a message from Curtis Stokes telling her to meet him at his place at 4am August 4th. After making the trek to Woodbury, Pennsylvania, she discovered Stokes was asleep, and did not respond to her banging on ... Read More »

62-Year-Old Died In A Slipknot Moshpit

Well, I think my fate may end up being the same as an old man’s. 62-year-old Richard Valadez was attending Knotfest, which is held outside of Chicago, on Sunday night. He had apparently had some drinks and had been enjoying himself throughout the day, chatting up other concert goers, and even hitting some of the mosh pits. About an hour ... Read More »

Ohio Man Steals Police Cruiser While Handcuffed

I am oddly impressed with this guy. 29-year-old Stephen Reynolds was passed out in his truck at a Shell station, which prompted some customers to call police. When they arrived, Reynolds was detained on a public intoxication charge, but a routine check discovered that the truck was stolen. Several of the responding officers had to leave to assist with a ... Read More »

Couple Tries To Sell Stolen Comics Back To Guy They Stole Them From

If you’re going to break into storage units, maybe do some research before you start selling the items inside. A St. Louis couple recently broke the lock off a storage unit and lifted about 3,000 comics from inside. The collection belonged to Martin Casas, who owns a comic book shop/bar called Apotheosis Comics & Lounge. Needless to say, Casas was devastated, ... Read More »

Florida Kid Calls 911, Gets Three Pizzas

It’s good to teach your kids about 911 and the importance of using it in an emergency. Also, kids should be taught what constitutes and emergency. 5-year-old Manuel Beshara was hungry on Friday night and called 911 because he needed some pizza, and asked the dispatcher to send one quickly. A little while later, there was a knock at the ... Read More »

Florida Woman Takes A Bite Out Of A Home Intruder

Here’s an instance where I am actually rooting for Florida Woman. 61-year-old Alice Coleman woke up last Monday morning to a fire alarm and opened the door to see what was going on. When she did, Fitzroy Morton pushed himself inside her apartment. He kept telling her, “‘No, mama. Everything gon’ be all right,’” Coleman said. “‘Everything’s not going to ... Read More »

Louisiana Woman Fires Shots At Plane Spraying for Mosquitoes

I imagine you would have to be quite drunk to mistake a manned, mosquito-spraying plane for a drone. But it happened. 40-year-old Stacy Nguyen Rodgers took three shots at the aircraft as it flew over her home. Several mosquito pools in that area had recently tested positive for West Nile Virus, so the state-owned aircraft was sent in to deal with ... Read More »

Science: Heavy Metal Is Good For Your Health

Metalheads, throw those horns up and celebrate! Science has confirmed that listening to heavy metal is indeed good for your mental health. According to psychology professor Nick Perham, “Recently published research has shown that fans do not become sensitized to violence . . . Indeed, studies have shown long-term fans were happier in their youth and better adjusted in middle age ... Read More »